Saturday, December 8, 2012

Erection 2012 Phun Kwiz by Alison Ross

Romney lost the 2012 election because:

a) He's rich and white
b) He's white and rich
c) All of the above
d) Both a and b

Obama won the 2012 election because:

a) He's black and rich
b) He's rich and black
c) All of the above
d) C only

Obama and Romney both:

a) Are rich
b) Cater to Big Oil
c) Cater to Wall Street and the wealthy elite
d) Choices a, b, and c

Obama and Romney differ in that:

a) They don't differ, except in skin tone
b) Romney hates the 47% and says it, Obama pretends to like the 47% but his policies say otherwise
c) Romney leans hard right, Obama gets hard while leaning to the right
d) Romney is a militant warmonger, Obama is a warmongering militant

Obama speaks with:

a) Platitudes laden with abstractions
b) Abstractions laden with platitudes
c) Broad strokes void of specifics
d) Both a and c

Obama's voting bloc is:

a) Riddled with faux-progressives
b) Riddled with progressive foes
c) Riddled with people who cannot figure out riddles
d) Riddled with riddled people

For his second term, Obama should:

a) Go all Latin American Socialist dictator on our ass
b) Go all FDR New Deal on our ass
c) Replace himself with someone who has testes or ovaries
d) Replace himself with someone who was born with a spine

The Obama Administration's support of the Israeli government's apartheid and military assaults in Palestine is:

a) Beyond reprehensible
b) Sick beyond measure
c) Disgustingly despicable
d) Pathetically typical of US imperialism

The ongoing military presence in Afghanistan and the drone attacks in Pakistan:

a) Show that Obama is just as imperialistic as all other presidents before him
b) Prove that Obama toes the line in American foreign policy
c) Disprove the perception that Obama is a peaceful progressive
d) All of the above

Race to the Top, Obama's public educational policy, is:

a) More destructive than No Child Left Behind because it favors the pervasion of for-profit Charter Schools
b) Sickeningly hypocritical since Obama's kids attend elite private schools
c) Both a and b
d) Both b and a

Obama/Biden and the Democrats are:
a) Automatons
b) Jellyfish
c) Automatic jellyfish
d) Jellified Automatons

This Phun Kwiz is:
a) Kick-ass
b) Ass-kicking
c) Booty-shaking
d) Shake-Bootying
e) Over

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