The Mystery of the Disappearing Jobs Market (Polemic) by Nick Noyes

For those fortunate enough to contain within themselves a slight anarchistic propensity, the illogical monotony and blatant hucksterism of an election cycle can be quite comedic—a dark comedy, of course, when you remember the hungry and desperate.

I imagine a politician’s speech writing group. Only a single item is scratched onto their blackboard: How can we say just enough to make it appear that we have said everything without actually saying anything? How can we convince them that we have solutions—jobs hidden like Christmas presents in the back of the closet—when we actually don’t? And how can we do this while maintaining that we’re not actually the problem? My imagined meetings are always short—daydream blips—as I know that these speech writers operate efficiently in their science.

 

(And if all else fails, they tell the politician, just go with the old “We need to get this economy moving again! And I know how!” The folks love that. Standing ovation.)
 

There’s a reason why there are never any clear and decipherable solutions offered, and there is a reason why politicians refuse to to address pragmatically the true reason why the world’s job market collapses like the rotten apples behind a foreclosed home.
 

Our economic problem doesn’t lie in the finding of a solution but in the application of the existing but meticulously hidden solution which remains so only to allow for the perpetuation of the established order. Here’s a secret: There is a fix to the economy, and it’s simple and readily available. The establishment knows about it and pray for its disappearance.
 

Let’s take it from the top. Where exactly did the jobs go? Well, they didn’t really go anywhere. They’re still here, humans, however, aren’t the ones doing them anymore. This little fact is largely ignored in political speech in favor of the sexier, more campaignable—cue some dramatic music—mystery of the disappearing jobs market. Spooky, right? This mysterious tale teaches the public to see the politicians as the Hardy Boys, and just like in Hardy Boys books, this mystery is a complete work of fiction.
 

I saw in a McDonalds a new machine. It dropped a plastic cup onto a conveyor belt. The cup moved slowly down the line. The cup stops. Fills with ice. Moves. Stops. Fills with Coke. Moves. Stops. A lid is pushed on. It is passed out a drive thru window. This, folks, is the mystery of the disappearing jobs market.    
 

Human job markets are replaced as technology advances. The public’s problem is not the “mysterious disappearance” of jobs but the political systems’ refusal to adapt to new ideas regarding occupation and labor in a technological society. The Recession is the result of politician subservience to corporate systems that remain steadfast as the beneficiaries of pre-21st century economic models of labor despite our current awkward dialectic synthesis of Industrial Revolution and grocery store self-checkout. 

 

The politicians cannot admit the necessity we have to alter our models, and if they did, the corporations that finance them would get hit substantially, and truth be told, the politicians aren’t the ones who require new models of labor. They’re not the ones losing. Their jobs aren’t the ones being replaced, and in fact, the recession actually makes their jobs easier. Why campaign on real issues? All we need is a the good ol’ “We need to get this economy moving again! And I know how!”
 

The politicians—and their corporations—are hell-bent on staying within this particular economic paradigm, and if they dared acknowledge the extinction of the pre-21st century economic model and shifted their focus to education, where jobs are actually created, they are exposed as not having a genuine political

agenda or anything worth anything to the public.

The politicians would lose their power over the helpless public and also - more importantly - their corporate paychecks.

Save for time-travel or The Road, there exists nothing that could return our economy to the way it used to be. Our economic system is outdated and unfit for today’s technological world—and if you don’t believe me, go to a grocery store on the 1st day of the month. We’re not in a recession but an unnecessarily awkward economic reconfiguration.
 

In 10 years time, when your own personal Google Infrastructure Repair Vehicle drives itself along fixing the pothole in your road while you eat your McChicken value meal that was pieced together and shot out of a quaint red and yellow box the size of a child’s dollhouse, who will the politicians conscript you to blame? Mexicans? the Chinese? The lingering effects of Obamacare? For the sake of your psychological well-being, may you be lucky enough to be blessed with a slight anarchistic tinge.

Author bio:

Nick Noyes is a young writer from Sun Valley, NV. Sun Valley is the (record keeping) largest trailer park in the world and a suburb of Reno, the second drunkest city in the US, and is located in northern Nevada, the state with the worst education scores. Nick Noyes is proud of where he comes from, or at least that's what he said in a job interview once. Nick Noyes can be found at Harvey's Bar or at nicknoyes.wordpress.com